What to expect at your first meeting

The meeting begins with you. We will ask you to set out your circumstances and explain, in your own words, what has happened, what you want to achieve and what your priorities are. We deliberately avoid sending lots of forms for you to complete before the meeting, as we think this can be overwhelming and frustrating. We prefer to give you the opportunity to freely explain what you need. Some people arrive with dates and documents; others simply talk it through. There is no right or wrong approach.

Once you have explained your position, we will ask questions to fill in the specifics - dates relevant to the relationship, and the broad values of any assets, liabilities and incomes. This is not a test, and you do not need precise figures to hand. The more detail you provide, the more tailored the advice we can give you, but if you don’t know certain details, then we will work with you to explain how these can be ascertained and why it is relevant.

With an understanding of your circumstances, we set out the law and the processes that apply, in plain English. Family law has its own vocabulary, but you will not need a legal dictionary; where a legal term matters, we explain what it means and why it is relevant to you. We think it is important you understand the context before we explain how the law applies to your specific circumstances. We also want to ensure you understand the various different ways to achieve the same outcome, so you are in a position to decide which is most appropriate for you.

Once we have explained the big picture, we then focus more on how the law is likely to be applied to your particular circumstances, based on what you have told us. The law is discretionary and, without further details, we won't be able to advise as to a definitive outcome, but we are normally able to set out how we think a judge would consider your circumstances using broad parameters.

We will take you through how pricing works - a traditional hourly rate, or a fixed monthly fee - and which structure is likely to suit the work for you. Whichever route fits, pricing is agreed in writing before any work begins, so cost should never become a source of tension.

The final part of the meeting is yours. Ask anything at all; no question is too small or too obvious. Before the meeting comes to an end, we agree the next steps, so that we are both clear on what is to take place after the meeting. There is no obligation to proceed, and no pressure to decide anything in the room; it is possible to follow up with questions or ask us to help at a later stage, and we will explain how that pricing would work.

Following the meeting, we send you guidance notes covering the areas of law relevant to your circumstances, and anything else discussed if we have agreed further steps. You leave with something to read in your own time, rather than having to remember everything that was said.

The first meeting is not about committing you to anything. It is about making sure you leave with a clear understanding of what is involved, so you can decide how you want to move forward - whatever that decision turns out to be. The stress of a separation is real, and we cannot remove all of it, but we can make sure the legal side of it stops feeling like the unknown.